Some Party Reviews
By Vladimir Zimakov

The Jello Party at the Spice House

Ahh, the first party of the year. There is nothing quite like it. Many newly arrived freshmen and highly established upperclassmen all crammed in the same place looking for looove. There was supposed to be something like Jell-O wrestling in 100 gallons of Jell-O. I showed up late and I guess I missed it. According to some people (Peter Bernal), the event was quite impressive.

The ups: free liquor.
The downs: not enough Jell-O.

The Porn Star Party at the Spice House

When I go to a party which in any way incorporates the word PORN in its title, there are about three things that I want to see. And that is PORN, PORN, PORN. Needless to say I was somewhat disappointed. The closest that party came to being pornographic happened during those few times when some heavily drunken lads revealed their asses to the masses. I heard about something more obscene happening earlier, but I guess I missed it because I showed up late. Oh well.

The ups: free beer.
The downs: Dimitri Pink got denied the booty.

Nathan's 20th Birthday Party at his loft

Now there is a party. 8 DJ's, 300 people, a bar, a twister game, and all up until 5 am. The DJs were pretty good. I was disappointed to find out that they weren't going to spin all at the same time: 16 turntables in a mad techno/house/rave orgy to end the world. But everything was still pretty awesome. People were dancing and having a good time.

The ups: the bar, DJ Booth, the guest appearance by Cody Large.
The downs: backpack flashlights and other unnecessary rave gear.